Attitude is what makes our personality. It tells exactly what kind of a person we are and what values we have earned from our parents. In the Philippines, attitude of each filipino varies according to the kind of upbringing they get. Philippines has many cultural differences due to some sort of influences. I grew up in a very traditional family. I mentioned in one of my posts that I was brought up by my grandparents who followed a spanish way of living. Generally, Filipino families follow most of the spanish culture in training and disciplining each member of the family. Because of this, we develop values that shape our attitude.

       Attitude comes only in two ways, a negative attitude, and a positive attitude. Our attitude might be good for us but might be alarming or irritating to others, or might be satisfying to others but fist clenching for us. Today, I am going to discuss some of the Filipino attitude I find really really disgusting and shameful.

Here are 3 Filipino attitudes that I certainly hate…

        1. Being Tsismoso or Tsismosa(chiz-mo-zo, za)- this attitude is about making up and exaggerating stories behind a person’s back. Usually it happens between friends, or even in the family. I grew up in a small barrio where residents know each other from the inside and out. So I was able to observed it then, and I realized how mean it could be. It ruins one good reputation in a snap. And I always observe this to some Filipinos I encounter EVERYWHERE.

          2. Being Over- dependent- this attitude is observed primarily in most families. The eldest son is 35 years old with a family of his own, and yet still lives with his parents. Asking anything that they need from diapers to food, then to buying clothes that they like. Makes my stomach churns when I see Filipino men, depend on the woman to run the house.

        3. Malicious or Bad Criticizer- this attitude makes wrong and unfavorable judgements to others. This is actually obvious to a group of Filipinos havin conversations. They get humor when they degrade some other Filipinos on their looks and what they do. They find someone to be the laughin stock of the day. So you’re unfortunate if they spot you now. They would say the worst things about you which you couldnt even imagine. Then when you you’re in front of them they’ll show you their best smiles.

        These are the 3 things I couldn’t bear. So I am deeply sorry if I mentioned it all here. I am a Filipino but I know one thing, I aint like them.

                                    When things are goin zig zag we can just look around and find something that could lighten the pressures of the day. I am in a place that gives me a hundred things to see everyday. Things that give me headache sometimes but I just try to digest them to be something that will put smile on my lips.

This man enjoyin his ice-cream on a hot summer evening at KFC. Yum yum yum!

G o n e 

I cried into the silence of the night

 my tears kissed the pillows

and my weeps filled the stillness of the hour

I stare out and found you’re gone..

gone.. gone… faster  than the swinging pendulum

faster than the breeze that instantly swayed the branches..

oh even faster than that of the speeding train..

I looked around to find traces of you

but nothing I found.

I looked inside and there I found you.

Only a memory of lost yesterday

because you’re gone..

“Your hands have made and fashioned me. Give me understanding that I may learn your commandments. Those who fear you shall see and rejoice because I have hope in your word. I know, Oh Lord, that your judgements are right, and that in faithfullness you have humbled me. Let your steadfast love become my comfort according to your promise to your servant. Let your mercy come to me, that I may live, for your law is my delight.”
“Let the arrogant be put to shame, because they have subverted me with guile, as for me, I will meditate your precepts. Let those who fear you turn to me. so that they may know your decrees. May my heart be blameless in your statutes, so that I may not be put shame.” Psalms 119:73-80

                  Learning and knowing God, our Father, is the hardest course to take. A narrow and endless road is to be undertaken, with a lot of distractions and hindrances on either sides. What are the hindrances and distractions after all? They are just those wonderful earthly things that shine along which attract us so we may be decieved and lured. They are just some enemies who try to stop us from walking toward His light. They are just minutes between seconds  that weaken our hearts from believing and trusting. Pretty tough to beat!

God has given us this freedom of choice so we may be able to exercise it according to His laws. That we may live in His righteousness each day. His jusdgements are never a result of hesitations nor trial and error. But always come in unequivocal perfectness. I feel high, and so much alive to realize that His love is never ceasing. Its inifinite, and superior than any love ever discovered by the human heart. Steadfast as it is. His love sustains the air that we breathe, His love fills our empty souls, and feeds our hungry spirits. Our hearts have been broken into tiny bits several times. We almost felt death creeping inside, but since He heals those who are weary, and comforts those who are lost, our hearts get better and become healed from any cuts and bruises and wounds. He gives us brand new heart taken from the pieces of His perfect heart.

Ohh such a marvelous feeling when we let Him inside. And a wonderful revelation awaits when we get to know HIM far beyond mediocrity.

The time I started answering authographs made by my classmates in highschool ( I used to have one too), I always pause when it comes to the question “what is love”. As far as I can remember, the phrase that I usually write is this “Love is blind…Love is sacrifice..” I have thought it so simple in that manner. Simple, in a way that its defined literally according to how everybody sees it including me at that time. If they see a couple not physically matched for each other, they would mumble “ohh love is blind..” If one has to give way, in a relationship, the reason behind is that “love is sacrifice”. Somehow, it makes a little sense, isn’t it?

 I have never imagined that this four-letter-word is deep enough that it is pretty hard to fathom. Love for me is the ultimate reason why people stay together. In a family, friendships and in intimate relationships. I may bet, almost everyone of us has been into failed relationships. There are a lot of underlying reasons why and how relationships fail.  So the question there is why does love fade.. or does it really meant to fade over time? does love get tired?  Oh love, love, love, I have thousand of questions in my head about love and I am quite sure you, too. I wanted a clear and exact definition of this word that I could apply in my life.

I am 25 years old now, at the peak of my tender years. I have been into hundred of fall downs and fly ups. I am proud of those moments in my precious life. Had not because of them, I woudn’t be able to finally discover what I have been searching for, the meaning of love. Love is actually the free exercise of choice. Each individual should exercise that freedom of choice in a good way. As a unique human being we have special needs in our life. This means that, we should learn to live independently in terms of emotions and decisions. When we love, we should know how to stand on our feet. We should never get dependent on someone’s dreams, emotions and decisions. May it be our parents, our husbands or wives, or even friends. M. Scott Peck, the author of the wonderful book I have read, The Roadless Travelled, that inspired and helped me come to understand love precisely, quoted that “People love each other only when they are quite capable of living without each other but choose to live with each other”. From that, I have finally realized why relationships fail, why we think love fades, why we think love gets tired. Fact is, Love never fades, nor gets tired. Most times we get so selfish we dont notice it. We hold their wings tight so they couldn’t fly. Sometimes, we tend to get so dependent on them that we are too scared to fly on our wings as well. If it happens that way, then its no longer love. Since it is freedom to make choices, we have plenty of rooms to discover about ourselves that could flourish our relationships. We are never locked into our small cubes that would stop us from learning something new and from becoming a better friend,  a better wife or husband, better girlfriend or boyfriend, or better parents.

You love someone sincerely when you let the person fly on its two wings. You, gazing from a distance looking high up on him/her. Glad to see how gracefully the person you love glides through the winds. Sometimes, you may fly side by side. Flying in the same direction toward your dreams…

 These are the verses that make my day complete. Whenever my heart is weary, these words uplift me and give me courage and enlightenment. I’ll share it with you readers. Bring out your Bibles then check them out. God’s grace and mercy be with us all.

Verses that show God’s assurance of strength, hope and protection.

Psalms 23v1-3 “The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads me beside still waters, He restores my soul. He leads me in right paths for His name’s sake.”

Psalms 27 “The Lord is my light and my salvation, whom shall I fear? The Lord is my stronghold of my life of whom shall I be afraid?”

Psalms 121v5-6 “The Lord is your keeper, the Lord is your shade at your right hand. The sun shall not strike you by day, nor the moon by night.

Psalms 121v7-8 “The Lord will keep you from all evil, He will keep your life. The Lord will keep your going out and your coming in from this time and forevermore.”

Psalms 62v5-7 “For God alone my soul waits in silence, for my hope is from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress, I shall not be shaken. On God rests my deliverance and my honor, my mighty rock, my refuge is in God.”

 Isaiah 43v5 “Do not fear for I am with you.”

Isaiah 26v4 “Trust in the Lord forever, for in the Lord God, you have an everlasting rock.”

Isaiah 25v4 “For you have been a refuge to the poor, a refuge to the needy in their distress, a shelter from the rainstorm and a shade from the heat.”

Luke 11v9-10 “Ask and it will be given to you, search and you will find, knock and the door will be opened for you.”

Verses that show God’s love and greatness.

Psalms 103v17 “But the steadfast love of the Lord is from everlasting to everlasting  on those who fear him.”
Psalms 135v3 “Praise the Lord for he is good, sing to his name for he is gracious”

Psalms 9v7-8 “But the Lord sits enthroned forever, he has established his throne of judgement. He judges the world with righteousness, he judges the people with equity.”

Psalms 135v13 “Your name oh Lord endures forever, your renown, Oh Lord,throughout all ages.”

Psamls 63v3 “Because your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise you.”

Psalms 104v1 “Bless the Lord oh my soul, Oh Lord my God you are very great. You are clothed with honor and majesty.”

Jeremiah 10v6 “There is none like you, Oh Lord, you are great, and your name is great in might.”

1Chronicles 29v11 “Yours, oh Lord, are the greatness, the power, the glory, the victory and the majesty, for all that is in the heavens and on the earth is yours, yours is the kingdom oh Lord, oh Lord and you are exalted as head above all. “

Lamentations 3v22-24 “The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, his mercies never come to an end. They are new every morning, great is your faithfulness. The Lord is my portion, therefore I will hope in HIM.

Job 33v4 “The spirit of God has made me, and the breath of the Almighty gives me life.”

Verses that show God as a great teacher

Isaiah 48v17 “I am the Lord who teaches you for your own good, who leads you in the way you should go.”

Isaiah 58v11 “The Lord wil guide you continually.”

Isaiah 64v8 “Oh Lord you are Father, we are the clay, an you are our potter, we are all the work of your hand.”

Luke 12v12 “For the Holy spirit will teach you at that very hour what you ought to say.”

Psalms 25v4-5 “Make me know your ways, oh Lord, teach me your paths. Lead me in your truth, and teach me for you are the God of my salvation, for you I will wait all day long.”

Proverbs 2v6 “For the Lord gives wisdom, from his mouth come knowledge and understanding.”

Job 28v28 “Truly the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and to depart from evil is understanding.”

               This world where we dwell is no longer a beautiful place to live in. There’s chaos everywhere, misunderstandings between contries, famine, poverty, crimes that escalate every minute of the day, uncontrollable prostitution, and a lot lot more. I wonder how God takes all this things in HIS heart. That’s how great He is. For every single wasted life, it gives His heart one huge cut. His heart bleeds because of our sins. But He still loves us no matter how many times we’ve cut His heart. He extends his arms to us so we may come to him and repent. So we will be able to have a brand new life.

Why do we fall into such acts that He hates? Probably because we are weak. When He calls to give us strength we dont listen. We have no faith in HIM. We are vulnarable to earthly callings that we get deaf and unwilling to answer HIS calls. He gave us freedom to choose the way to take. Thats one of the greatest gifts He has given us. That, we may drive and be the captain of our life. An amazing freedom, none of us appreciate. An amazing freedom that we abuse.

Each year, we commemorate Jesus’s crucifixion. To remind us how he suffered and died on the cross to redeem us from our sins. And yet, only few can internalize His sufferings and still continue falling in the pits of sin.

God doesnt demand anything from us. He just wants us to look into our hearts and feel HIM inside. Our heart is His home. When we take time to listen to our hearts and pray solemnly, He hears us. That is why for every agony we take, He’s hurt first and foremost. When we cry, He sheds tears more than us because His tears is blood. This world is already heavy in His palm and the sins of the world make it a lot heavier.

 Now let us take a minute to listen to our hearts and feel His greatness and mend His broken heart. A smile and a little prayer will heal those cuts we’ve made. That’s how much His love works for us.

It has been 5 years I haven’t gone back to my hometown, Catanduanes. I got stuck in my studies and my job in Manila and had never got a chance to get a vacation. Well, a week vacation isn’t really a good idea to go home. Obviously, I am talking a month vacation (which is quite impossible) because there are a lot of things to do and see and a few days would just make me feel so disappointed.

Here’s how to get there. From Manila to Tabaco it takes 10-12 hours by bus. Then from Tabaco you gotta take a ferry that will take you to Catanduanes Island and it takes 2-4 hours to get there. But there’s also a another way to get there if you aint strong enough to fight sea sickness. That is taking a plane from Manila to Virac Catanduanes. Taking the plane will give you all the comfort but you’ll apparently miss the best sights on the way.

This past few days, I dont know why I miss home so much. I miss my childhood place. Fortunately, I was able to get in touch with my aunt residing in Germany. And I asked her if she could spare me some pictures taken recently of the beaches and of some places there. She didn’t think for a second or two, she sent me right away and I was really really glad and thankful. I would like to share some of the photos so people could get a glimpse of how my little island looks like. The minute I saw them I’ve gone nuts and made me miss home sooooo sooooo sooooo badly and terribly. I wont miss a spot when I go home. To my sweetest pea, you can also take a little tour here. I’ll take you to my little Island one day. You gonna love it.

At Batalay Beach.. Just 30 minutes away from Bagumbayan. I and my highschool mates used to camp here. The sea is just so clear and blue. I also used to roll and bury myself in the sand. I remember everytime my friends ask me to join them on a night camping at the sea shore, my grandma would give me her sharp look and then complain why cant we do it in the morning. In this picture, the two ladies are my aunts.

This is one of the best falls in Catanduanes. The San Miguel Falls. I’ve just been there once. This place is soo awesome. Haven’t been discovered by a lot of people.

The coconut tree. I used to climb it when I was little. And you gotta try the coconut fruit. You’d love its refreshing juice that would really quench your thirst on a hot summer day. I haven’t eaten that in ages. Godddd!!!

Sunset at Magnesia Beach. Such an awesome and breathtaking sight.

This is what we call the Gumamela flower. You can find it anywhere. And it is easy to grow usually in a tropical place. We have that in our little garden in front of our house. My grandma likes flowers by the way.

I wanna say my sincere thanks to Manay Cit for not hesitating to give me these photos. I appreciate it wholeheartedly. She told me she’d be travelling back home sometime next month so I am hoping she could get a picture of our old house there.

Catanduanes…the pearl of the orient seas. This is the beautiful island where I grew up. The place marked deeply in my heart. Bato is the tiny town where I spent my delicate years. From the little know- nothing -at -all -yet girl to the the woman I am now. My hometown shaped my perspectives in life. It is the very first place that embraced me and watched me grow each day. It witnessed my witty charms and naughty escapades. I left this place right after I finished my highschool and move on to the bigger city world. As everyone believes that in the city, it is where thousand oppurtunities and possibilities rest. It gets smaller and smaller upon my eyes as I drift and sail away to find what my heart desires. I said to myself what a big big world to see and experience. Which I truly proved that it is. And that this Island is just one spec of dot. However, no matter how big the world is, and how little my Island had become, it always has a strong force thats pulling me back. Memories from yesterday in the place that brought me up are sealed in my heart. It is the magnet that pulls me back to its ports. Where ever I may be, whatever accomplishments I’ll achieve, I would always give credit to this place. I am happy to leave this place but I’ll be happiest having to be back again. Someday soon I will.. I’m pretty sure I will…